.
.
art galleries
are remote places
an offense to many
and these hush tones
mocking pretenses
regret does not hide well here
I want to go to a poetry gallery
and see the words
framed and clear
dressed for scrutiny
and listen to the voices
protesting forms
condemning structures
proclaiming astuteness
as if they had the balls
to gut themselves
I doubt they could
fill a scratch pad
with honesty
as heavily indebted
to their pathos,
as they are
writers have balls
.
.
kahnefan…I was about to pay attention to you, but no….as you have never asked or answered a SINGLE post in poetry, get some weight and come back…in the mean time…my balls are here
Ummmmmm……… NAAAHHHH. A true poet would not be so quick to praise himself. Honestly, I don’t think your poem is all that great. I have boxes and boxes of writing that I have done over the years. Do I flaunt it? NO. I can tell you that this "self important" display of your own work is not horrible. It’s not bad, really, but it’s not good either. You should dial down the arrogance a bit and just ask what people think, if you really want to know. There are plenty of writers out there that are better than you.
-Uh, Yeah I have! I actually have a best answer in editting a poem that someone wrote! I am a pretty good poet, but thanks anyways. I didn’t say your poem was bad, I just said that you shouldn’t act so self important, really. If you care so much about making a statement, then ask what people really think! I’m truly not trying to insult you, by the way.
-P.S. Here is the poem. It was in Lyrics:
Best Answer - Chosen by Voters
Ok, you are the mastermind behind this poem. I LOVE it! I changed it a little. I hope you like it. Here goes:
I wish I’d wake up in another world
A world in which it all goes by word
That word of which has been passed down
Nobody can break it or change it’s plan
As everybody marches on that way
I turn my back to go astray
They watch me take a ride to nowhere
No one looks now - I deserve no stare
So even when no one sets himself apart
Some go, eventually, after their own heart
With time maybe it won’t seem so weird
That’s what all of us did
Are we really so different?
Ok, I changed the words some. I am a little OCD when it comes to editing and by the time I’m done, I sometimes change the words a little more than people like. I do think your poem is great though! It makes a lot of sense.
Source(s):
I love poetry and write a lot of my own
3 months ago
- Ok, all of that starting with "Best Answer" was copied and pasted from my profile. Does that work for you?
-This is not my poem, this is just one I edited for someone. I am just making the point that I have answered questions about poetry. I don’t post my own. I am writing a book. I have won awards for my writing. I don’t need to ask questions on here.
-Ok, saying that I have won awards is being a bit arrogant. That is exactly what I am saying you shouldn’t be. I’m sorry. That is the truth though. Why would I still be on here if I didn’t care? I do honestly appreciate great writing and love to read original poems. Keep writing! You are good.
April 30th, 2010 at 7:11 am
My balls are HUGE!…..sometimes.
Good write, but will they care? Hmmmm.
References :
April 30th, 2010 at 7:54 am
Ah - the poetry gallery. Where the poet (in disguise) - drifts in and out - of the crowd. Taking in - ALL the comments - about his work. Good and bad - is taken in. The poet - his personal emotions - ignored. Takes in the reactions - trims his work - and sets them all - on his selected course. The poetic navigator ♥
http://dsmsbestpractices.pbworks.com/f/Beatnik1.jpg
References :
April 30th, 2010 at 8:11 am
nice try 15
References :
April 30th, 2010 at 8:42 am
Have a star for usage
of the words "balls, gut,
scratch and pathos
in a modern poem.
Had you used "ocean,
photon, Harry, Luna
or Mars I would hold
my star and perhaps
take a walk in my square
and hug a tourist.
References :
April 30th, 2010 at 9:26 am
ok I get the dig and whom it’s aimed at but I have balls of brass and an art gallery too. I pull wood off trmite infested barns for the character in it and paint on it and then I fling my balls over my shoulder and stand back to admire it in my art gallery.
if you want to stereotype me …call me a dumb blonde but dont diss my art or my balls…
(i’m smiling…you can’t see it so im telling you)
References :
April 30th, 2010 at 10:01 am
Ummmmmm……… NAAAHHHH. A true poet would not be so quick to praise himself. Honestly, I don’t think your poem is all that great. I have boxes and boxes of writing that I have done over the years. Do I flaunt it? NO. I can tell you that this "self important" display of your own work is not horrible. It’s not bad, really, but it’s not good either. You should dial down the arrogance a bit and just ask what people think, if you really want to know. There are plenty of writers out there that are better than you.
-Uh, Yeah I have! I actually have a best answer in editting a poem that someone wrote! I am a pretty good poet, but thanks anyways. I didn’t say your poem was bad, I just said that you shouldn’t act so self important, really. If you care so much about making a statement, then ask what people really think! I’m truly not trying to insult you, by the way.
-P.S. Here is the poem. It was in Lyrics:
Best Answer - Chosen by Voters
Ok, you are the mastermind behind this poem. I LOVE it! I changed it a little. I hope you like it. Here goes:
I wish I’d wake up in another world
A world in which it all goes by word
That word of which has been passed down
Nobody can break it or change it’s plan
As everybody marches on that way
I turn my back to go astray
They watch me take a ride to nowhere
No one looks now - I deserve no stare
So even when no one sets himself apart
Some go, eventually, after their own heart
With time maybe it won’t seem so weird
That’s what all of us did
Are we really so different?
Ok, I changed the words some. I am a little OCD when it comes to editing and by the time I’m done, I sometimes change the words a little more than people like. I do think your poem is great though! It makes a lot of sense.
Source(s):
I love poetry and write a lot of my own
3 months ago
- Ok, all of that starting with "Best Answer" was copied and pasted from my profile. Does that work for you?
-This is not my poem, this is just one I edited for someone. I am just making the point that I have answered questions about poetry. I don’t post my own. I am writing a book. I have won awards for my writing. I don’t need to ask questions on here.
-Ok, saying that I have won awards is being a bit arrogant. That is exactly what I am saying you shouldn’t be. I’m sorry. That is the truth though. Why would I still be on here if I didn’t care? I do honestly appreciate great writing and love to read original poems. Keep writing! You are good.
References :
April 30th, 2010 at 10:47 am
oh yes this absolutely needed to be, HP. Tell me when the gallery opens, i’ll put my poems up like a pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey game
References :
April 30th, 2010 at 11:25 am
Sign me up for the gallery. I assume there will be a security screening more stringent than those for the airlines. Do critics have to use their real names?
Where did we get the pilgrim?
Actually, I really like this little verse. Nice one.
References :